The Glory of Shoveling Snow
Mood:  mischievious
Now Playing: Laura Ingram Show
Topic: The Glory of Shoveling
The Blizzard of ’06 is now a mere memory, leaving in its wake a record amount of snowfall. It is during such climatological calamities that one can take stock of the quality of manhood in his neighborhood. Specifically, how many men are hopelessly addicted to mechanization over muscle, snowblower over snow shovel.

Now, certain people are not to be criticized for mechanical dependency---the aged and the infirm, for example. These individuals are to be excused if they require the aid of a snowblower to clear their property. However, men who are physically fit have no such excuse; they are manifestly guilty of what I call “gadgetism”, the irrational and unhealthy need to have a machine perform all manner of physical activity. This illness has been spreading faster than Asian bird flu, infecting men (yes, some women too) and crippling their manhood. Next thing you know, your brother / father / son has become a couch potato who uses his car to retrieve the mail. It is an altogether lamentable state of affairs.

Needless to say, gadgetism is often on display after a major snowstorm. I often find myself shaking my head in disbelief as neighbors, with driveways so small that they would barely qualify as walkways, bring out massive snowblowers to do the “hard work” of removing snow (I could understand if volcanic pumice was involved, but snow???). Give me a break! While these men of soft muscles gleefully enslave themselves to machines, I wield an old-fashioned shovel (and not one of those wimpy back-saver models either) and apply American sweat and muscle to clear a driveway so big that is has often been mistaken for a private runway. Sure, it takes real effort, and the resulting achy muscles come morning, but it is worth it as I get to retain my dignity and my freedom from gadgetism.

My attitude may smack of being a Luddite, but so what? Is being a Luddite so bad? Mind you, I am not a true Luddite as he would eschew an internet-connected PC, an attitude that would quickly cause me to assume the fetal position. However, I do admire the Luddite apprehension at creeping mechanization. When we are no longer capable of shoveling driveways, when the idea of using our muscles causes real fear, then something is dangerously amiss with American manhood. There is no honor is hiding behind machines. Would Achilles have used a mechanized sword to dispatch Hector? For that matter, would Hector have hid behind a machine, even if it may have saved his life from the wrath of Achilles? I think not. I think both would have been ashamed to allow a machine to share in their glory. So it is with me. A snow shovel takes longer, and requires greater effort, but when the snow is cleared, the glory is all mine.